femme-cceleration

Things are really picking up speed and momentum now! I finally got to talk to my brother and tell him about my transition (he already knew about the dressing) during his visit last weekend. As expected he was his usual tight-lipped self, but after some prodding I did manage to assure him and our mutual friend C who had flown up from Baltimore to visit, that I'm still the same person and that our ritual sibling ribbing and joking will continue unabated. He said it would take some getting used to, of course, but he assured me he had no problem with it so I hope all is well on that front. On friday we played golf with a bunch of his high school and college buddies - great guys I have known for decades (but almost all, like my brother, of the keep-it-all-inside, don't-talk-about-feelings type of manly, family men).

Anyways, my brother had already told me he had shared my dressing issues with a couple of his friends when they asked about my appearance the last time I saw them around x-mas, which I was totally cool with and my brother said there were no problems there. As we were playing golf (and I was playing horribly btw - I may just give that sport up!), playing with the two guys that knew about my dressing and another that didn't, I was wracking my brain for how to bring the subject up. Finally, after about 5-6 beers in the searing sun, I came up with a (in retrospect probably foolish, half-assed) plan. In between holes I just blurted out, "Hey - wanna see something weird?" and then I lifted up my Hawaiian shirt and flashed them! Needless to say, they were a bit stunned. The two in the other cart didn't say much, but my cart mate asked me about it and I gave him the 2 minute version of my story and plans, which I hoped he might share with the others if asked. The rest of the weekend went by uneventful except for the tons of food, drinking, swimming, tubing, sun, cards, horseshoes and lounging that typically goes on at our Adirondack lake camp when there are guests.

On a slightly different note, I also met again with the diversity officer at work (a local college) and she told me of her efforts and education since I had shared my plans with her a few weeks ago. Things are looking awesome on that front, albeit, they will be happening faster than I first anticipated. She assured me that she had spoken to the college president and senior administration about me and that they were behind me completely and were also going to make an effort to amend college policies to include gender as an explicit legal protection from discrimination (because there is no such protection in NYS law). However, she also confirmed my own research in that there have already been several state agency precedents for gender-expression protection as well as state court interpretations to include gender in the already existing "sexual orientation" protections. I was never that worried about those aspects of things, since I think I'm pretty good at my job and valued there, but it was still good to hear all this.

We also worked out a rough schedule to share things with the wider college. Short version: I'll be having several meetings with my immediate library co-workers, and department and building colleagues in July or August to reveal all. I am still sticking to my plan to start living 24/7 around the start of the new year, but we both felt it would be better to reveal things sooner than that and to give people (and me) time to adjust to, ask questions, and voice concerns about the realities of working together before I start showing up in skirts and heels!

And while the heat and humidity has been very oppressive around here lately and I feel a little stress with changes happening so fast, I still feel all smiley and light and free because everyone so far has been so amazingly awesome and supportive with all this. And most importantly, I am moving closer to realizing the real me! As always, there are still lots of barriers to cross, but every moment I'm getting closer to realizing the biggest goal I have ever had in my life - and enjoying the ride as well...